Idolatry
by BraveTheElements
Summary: The original Perfection is complete. Tell me what you think. Rhyming is neat. T for mild language, suggestion, situations, and  insert shocking thing here. Theodore and Eleanor.
1. Part 1

**A/N: **_**Idolatry **_**is the original storyline of Perfection. This story focuses less of the supernatural and more on the psychological. The first part of this chapter and the first part of chapter two is the same as Perfection. In chapter two, it gets different. Very different. Like completely re-written different. If you enjoyed Perfection, you'll enjoy this one, hopefully even more than the first one. I know I do. **

I woke up out in the rain again. I checked my phone; it's 5 am Monday Morning. I can't believe I have to go to school today. It's so cold. I'm not really wearing anything, just pajama pants. The water starts to mat my fur. I felt my chest. I'm soaking wet. The sun is starting to rise over the housetops. It was May, but the mornings were still bitter cold. It had been raining all week. Relentless, mother nature. She's dealing a cold hand. Why is it so cold? I got up and checked around myself. I was in the backyard. It's better than the front I guess. Getting to my feet I look inside the house. Simon was in the kitchen. He was looking for something, perhaps something to eat. If that's so, he's really looking for me.

The water dripped from my hair. I'm still groggy; my vision still wasn't perfect. Stumbling, I found my way to the back door. It was locked. It would be best not to knock. Alvin was going to still be asleep. I looked around the house again. The day was already starting to lighten up. It was a greenish shade of grey. I've never seen the sky look green before. I started to walk around to the front of the house. I got outside somehow. It might have been through the front door. My sight returned to me completely. The house was light by individual lights; the gradient of light and dark played with my eyes. Dancing shadows moved through the front and faded into the black. I got into the kitchen. I puddle of water started to form underneath me. Simon didn't notice me enter. He was facing away from me. I took another step and he turned around, startled.

"Theodore?" he said as he walked towards me, "Were you just outside?"

"Yeah," I didn't know what I should say. I hesitated and he looked inquisitively at me, "I just stepped out to get the paper."

He paused and looked at me carefully, "Where is it?"

"Where is what?"

He looked sternly, "The paper? You know, the thing you just went to get."

"Oh," I paused, "It's in the sink in the bathroom. It was too wet for me to bring in here."

"And yet your dripping wet self is fine. I wasn't aware that it was raining so hardly outside."

I started to walk away," Yeah it was weird. It picked up and then dropped again. I'm going to dry myself off," I left the kitchen and started to go upstairs. It was dark; none of the lights were on. I got to the top and Alvin was steeping out of the bathroom.

"Oh Theo, I didn't know that you had already taken a shower. I didn't hear you in there."

"Yeah, I took one a while back when you were sleeping," I said, trying to get behind him.

"Cool, yeah. I'll see you downstairs. Do you want to drive today?"

"I'm not feeling it." I walked past him.

"Alright," he paused and walked to the stairs, "I'll ask Simon."

I started to dry off and change. I didn't have time to take a legitimate shower. Alvin already thinks that I took a shower today anyway. It would be weird to take one again. I can't find anything to wear.

* * *

"Simon, did you hear Theo take a shower today?" Alvin and Simon had made themselves breakfast in the absence of Theodore. I usually make breakfast. They must have been a bit lost, but breakfast isn't that complicated to make so hopefully they figured it out.

"I didn't, why?"

Alvin spooned another bit of cereal into his mouth, "Oh, well, he was all wet and he told me that he had already taken a shower. I was just weird. I usually hear the two of you take showers, even when I sleep. It's what wakes me up in the morning," Simon laughed at this, "I only heard one shower today, which I assumed was yours because you're usually up first, or still awake from the night before. I just didn't hear him take one. I may have just not heard him take a shower this morning. I'm not sure. Was the shower already wet when you got in?"

"No," Simon said as he got up and put his dishes away, "It was bone dry. You see, Theodore told me the reason he was wet was because he went out to get the paper this morning. It was odd, he was much more wet than he should have been," I started to walk downstairs and they stopped talking. I paused on the stairs and listened. They had completely stopped so I continued down to meet them.

Alvin put up his dishes, "Oh hey Theo."

"Hey guys," I grabbed an apple and some tea I had made last night.

"Theo, I thought you told me you got wet from going outside."

I looked up at him as I was sitting down, "yeah, I did."

"Well, you told Alvin that you got wet from taking a shower."

"I never said that," what were they trying to pull here?

"You told him you had taken a shower when I didn't hear you or anything. The tub was bone dry when I got in there as well."

"Alvin had just asked me if I had taken a shower, which I did take one, at like 3 in the morning. I didn't go to sleep last night. I had a paper due, so I took my laptop downstairs, as to not disturb the two of you." This lie is starting to get far too intricate.

"You told me that you were wet because of a shower," Alvin said as he stared at me.

"No I didn't, you asked me if I took a shower, not why I was wet," I wish they would just stop wondering.

"Oh,"

"Where's your laptop now?" Simon asked. They couldn't have known. There's no way.

"My bag," I put my bag onto the kitchen table and threw the apple core into the trashcan.

"Can I see it?" he was starting to get irritated.

"I simply don't understand what your deal is today."

He stepped towards me, "I just want to see it."

"Why?"

"What are you covering up?"

I paused. He looked worried and Alvin just looked away, "nothing," I opened up my bad and took out my laptop, "look, here's the paper I was working on last night. Please you two, I'm tired and I'm ready to get the day over with now that it's just started. Can we just get to school?" The headache started again. It was dull, but persistent.

Alvin started to walk out of the kitchen. He grabbed the keys off of the ring as he walked out, "come on, let's just go," the rain hadn't stopped yet and he ran to the car. I put my laptop back in my bag and stood up, Simon stayed back with me. His eyes were worried.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I was just concerned."

My face was a blank slate, "Worried about what? I'm fine."

"Yeah, yeah. I know that now."

* * *

The rain had let up by the time we got to school. I put in my iPod. Tokyo Police Club. It would be the best thing right now. The myriad of faces flashed past me as I walked up to the school doors. Simon and Alvin talked to each other as we walked in. They were laughing. I wonder what it was about. It was still overcast as we got in. It would be for the remainder of the day.

When we got to our lockers, which were situated next to each other for obvious reasons, the two left for their first period classes. 20th century American History for Alvin, and AP Physics for Simon. I would be heading out to AP Literature and Composition for the first part of the day. I sat down and rubbed my temples. The headache would not leave me. I opened my locker again and grabbed a bottle. Aspirin, it would be my only saving grace in the really bad days. I sat down again and took out my phone. It was 10 minutes until class started. The sound of the halls was crashing in my head. The pain started to worsen. I took the pills and sunk my head into my knees. I felt someone sit next to me. I looked up.

"Are you alright?" It was Eleanor. She always seemed to be there when I needed her to be.

"Yeah," I said, exhaling a huge breath.

"You don't seem okay."

"Looks can be deceiving."

She laughed, "Seriously, what's wrong."

"I have a headache. That's all, nothing to be worried about."

"You should really let me worry about you sometimes," she got up and held out her hand, "Are you ready?"

Her hand, a simple gesture of kindness that exemplified her beauty. She was never down, and, no matter how sad I could get, she was always there with a hand and a smile. I grabbed her hand and she helped me up. Our hands lingered. She looked at me, deeply. I couldn't look away, and I smiled. She was the picture of perfection to me. I couldn't understand why, "Thanks," she laughed and put her hand down at her side hastily. When it was at her side, it seemed like she didn't know what she wanted to do with it. I put in my iPod again, only one ear this time.

"We should go," we had first period together. I grabbed the pill bottle from the floor where I had left it and put it in my backpack.

"Let's go," we started to walk in silence. She looked anxious. Her eyes would flit to me and quickly go back to the hallway. There were too many people in the hallway for her to keep her eyes on me all the time I guess.

"So, um, what are you listening to?" It was odd. She would seem nervous around me at times. We were usually so comfortable around each other, and she exuded confidence when around others, but with me she was reserved. I had always wondered what she felt around me. I think it is obvious. I didn't want to be made the fool.

"Grizzly Bear, Two Weeks," I looked down at her again. I always got drawn in by her eyes. There was something about her eyes. The Hazel color was always changing. The change maybe?

"I think you showed them to me, right?"

"Yeah, I did," I wish I knew what she was thinking about. She was searching for something to say. I killed to conversation on accident. Silences are so awkward. My headache started to go away. We got into the room and sat down next to each other.

"How do you think the paper went for you?"

"It should have been fine. I had Mrs. King for English freshman year. It's been a while, but she grades papers the same way."

"Even after three years, she grades the same?"

"Yeah."

"Oh, okay." The silence came back. I hate it when the headaches come. I can't seem to hold conversation with anyone. The silence held for the rest of the period.

* * *

"Fuck," It was third period and I was rubbing my temple again. The pain had set in. I looked at my phone. It was half past noon. I could take some pills again. I said it softly enough that nobody heard it. I was in Calculus with Jeanette at the time. She was sitting next to me, and she didn't even so much as look over.

"Theo?"

"Yeah?"

"Have you gotten anywhere on problem seventeen?"

"I haven't," she looked over to me, and I was still rubbing my temples.

"Hey, are you alright?"

"It's just a headache,"

"You look like you're in a lot of pain," I was. And she could tell.

"I'm fine,"

"But,"

"I'm fine, please just drop it." I snapped at her. Jeanette withdrew. She was hurt, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"You should go take something for it," she looked worried.

"Yeah," I raised my hand. The teacher, Mr. Williams, called on me.

"Yes Mr. Seville?" he was always so unpleasant to deal with.

"Can I use the restroom really quickly?"

"Yes you may," he was surprisingly easy to deal with today. I got up and Jeanette watched me was I walked out of the room. Her eyes were burning my back.

I got to the restroom and pulled out the pill bottle I had on my person. It was empty, "Oh goddammit, really?" I walked and put my back against the wall. I looked at the bottle again and threw it against the wall. I slid down the wall and put my head in between my knees. What was I trying to accomplish my sitting here? Maybe it would help my pain. The spikes in pain were killing me. I heard the door open.

"Theo, what are you doing?" It was one of my classmates, Jackson.

"Jackson, are you selling right now?"

"Me? No, not right now."

"Who is then?"

* * *

I walked outside and went to the parking lot. There were two guys talking next to a car. I recognized one of them; he was in my class, and one was a junior. The senior would be the dealer, Jackson informed me. His name was Kyle. They caught sight of me and the junior walked away and Kyle smiled.

"Theodore Seville, what brings you to my office today?"

"Oh ha ha. If it wasn't completely outlandish enough that you wait outside in the parking lot all day, you don't need to pretend like this is a movie or something."

He laughed, "You're in quite a mood today. You usually seem to be so happy-go-lucky, why is today so different? Do you have an itch only I can scratch?" This guy was a complete idiot.

"Again with the theatrics. What do you have?"

"What do you want?"

"A pain killer?"

"Ah, yes. I have some vicodin, perks, k-pins-"

"K-pins aren't for pain,"

"Well aren't we so knowledgeable. Considering this is your first time here I thought you wouldn't know anything," It's true, I hadn't bought anything before. Drugs hadn't been on my mind before today.

"Yeah alright, Vicodin will do fine."

"3 a pill then," I handed him a twenty and he handed me a baggie.

"No change?" I asked.

"Count it, there's seven in there. Consider it a gift for a first timer."

"Oh, well, thanks." I started to walk away.

"It was a pleasure," he got into the car next to him, which I could only assume was his, "I'll see you again soon!"

I certainly hope he's not right.

I went back inside and past the guards. They didn't question me. When I got into a bathroom I took the bad out and cut the pill in half and took it. Almost immediately, it started to work. For the first time in many weeks, the pain alleviated. I sat down on the floor again. It smelled like urine. I sat there for a while and looked back at my watch. It was five till one. I had been done for almost a half hour. I got up and started back for class.

"Mr. Seville, wonderful for you to join us again!" Mr. Williams threw his hands in the air. What a clown, making a spectacle out of me. It didn't bother me, "Where have you been?"

"I've been feeling sick. You know when you can't decide if you're going to throw up or not. I was in that limbo for a while," The class started to laugh and I smiled.

"Well, did you make a decision?"

"I chose not to vomit," The bell rang. I went over and grabbed my bag. Jeanette stood up and walked over to me.

"You feel better?"

"Like new, thanks," her eyes light up. She must have believed me. How high was I right then? I'm not sure. I was high enough to seem fine. The pain was gone, that's all that mattered to me. The side effects were making me feel fantastic otherwise. No complaints really.

The last period of the day went normally, and completely pain free. I left and met Alvin and Simon at our lockers. Alvin threw me the keys.

"It's you turn to drive!" he shouted as he started to walk away. I put my things away and caught up with them. I threw the keys to Simon.

"I didn't sleep last night," I didn't want to risk anything, "It would be a bad decision for me to drive right now," I knew Simon would take the bait. He was cautious and responsible.

"That's true, I'll drive, but tomorrow, it's your turn."

"Fair enough."

* * *

It was about six o'clock when Eleanor and I were supposed to meet to finish a project we had been working on about The House of Spirits by Allende. It wasn't too complicated. She arrived a bit late, and, as usual, was very apologetic. We went to the basement, where I was starting to spend most of my time. There were old couches, from when Dave was a bachelor and my desk was down there. I turn on some music and we got started again. It was a short screenplay about the characters.

About 30 minutes in, we finished the project. It was saved. It was printed, and we were done. Eleanor, who had been doing the typing while I had been doing the talking, looked up at me, "Are you alright?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" I turned away from her, "Am I doing things that make it seem like I'm alright?"

"The headaches, I've noticed them. You took a 30 minute bathroom break today," I looked at her, "Jeanette told me about it."

"I'm fine. I can't afford to be not fine."

"Why's that?"

"As I stand, me, and all of us, stand on the edge of a knife. We're starting our Exuent tour in the summer, signally the end of our careers. Until then, we're all still under the microscope of the people's unforgiving eye."

"So what does that matter?"

"So what does that matter? They would tear me apart! I would be thrown out of the music business' conscientious."

"Theodore," she stood up and touched my elbow, "All because of a few headaches?"

"It's not just that. Please, if I tell you this, you can't tell anyone, alright?"

"You can always trust me, you know that."

"Ellie, I've been waking up outside sometimes."

"So you sleep walk I do it to," she smiled and brought herself closer.

"My vision blurs. I'm anxious and I feel like I'm on the verge of falling apart at any moment."

She looked worried, "Have you told a doctor any of this yet? You could be really sick!"

"The shadows play with my eyes. I can't discern what's real and what's a dream sometimes. I wake up thinking I've gone thinking I've gone through an entire day sometimes. I lose contact with my sense of reality and I wake up on the other side. My soul drifts, I can feel it drifting."

"Teddy-" Teddy, she's never called me that before, "You need to go to a doctor."

"I can't, not until we finish the tour. I owe it to everyone to let us go out without any sort of tainting."

"We won't be tainted! You won't be tainted!"

"We'll only be remembered by how I went crazy and couldn't do the final concert. I'll be fine. If I don't do this, we can't fade out of the public's mind easily. That's what you want right? We agreed upon that last year. To fade. We can't do it if I start taking medication and start seeing a psychiatrist."

"You can't do this to yourself."

"Yes I can," she looked up at me. She grabbed my hand and led me to the couch. I sat down, and she sat down in my lap, facing me. She leaned in, our lips met. I don't know what to say at this point. My eyes were wide open. I slowly closed them. She came off of me. I'm still in complete shock. It had been ten years since we meet. She was my best friend.

"Well, if you're going to try this whole crazy bullshit, I'm going to be there with you. I don't condone it by any means. At all. I'm just aware that I can't change your mind. Instead of fighting it, I'm going to make sure you don't die in the process," she was so light hearted about it. She should be, she doesn't know the extent to which I suffer. Her optimism was rubbing off on me.

"Wha-?" I'm not nearly as articulate in my mind as I am in real life. She pounced on me, throwing me down to the couch. She was still on top of me, and again she pulled away.

"You're going to need someone in this journey. I'll be there for you."

"What if I end up being crazy, what will we do then?"

"I can't imagine you being crazy."

"Why's that?"

"You're sane enough to have a plan. You're sane enough to know you might be going slowly mad. You're sane enough to accept my help," She was bathed in the golden light of the old lamps. Was she here to save me?

"Why haven't we done this earlier?"

"I don't know, I was never sure about how you felt. I just didn't care tonight. You are in pain that much I can clearly see. I thought, it would be helpful for you to know that there's one person that loves you."

"I love you too Eleanor, I always have," She leaned in and we lost ourselves in time. When we came back to, it was nearing midnight. Dave was away on business thankfully. He would have yelled at me all night. She left and I stayed in the basement and slept there that night. When I went to sleep, I realized that it wasn't all just a dream, and that I had been awake. My headache faded away. I didn't need to take anything that night. Eleanor was already helping me. Before I went to sleep, I wondered what would happen to me that night and I started to wish.

I wished things were simple. I wished I could just be with her. I wished that I could just sleep. I wished that I didn't wake up from this dream.


	2. Part 2

The next day I wasn't plagued by the headaches. I had a good night's sleep for the first time in a long time. I wonder why that is. Could it be because of her? Eleanor, you do so many things for me. The day went by normally. I decided to walk home with Eleanor that afternoon. Alvin and Simon knew why. They couldn't stop smiling. I hope they're happy. I hope that's why they were smiling.

"So, no headaches today?" It was hard to concentrate on her. Her very touch set my mind to wandering. We held hands as we walked through the park. I could only think of her touch. After a long pause, I answered her.

"Yeah it's been a great day. I'm not feeling bad, and I get to spend time with you," she smiled at me and we got closer to my house. Maybe I had over-estimated the chance happenings of my psyche. I guess I had only been sleepwalking. I had been really tired as a result. The sleep deprivation would explain everything. The silver lining of this fiasco? Eleanor. After years of sexual tension and subtle flirting, it's finally happened. I couldn't be happier right now. For the first time in days, the sky was clear and the sun was shining. WE got to my house, and I opened the door for her.

"Dave?" she said. She must be mistaken. Dave wouldn't be home for another two weeks. I walked into the door and put my backpack down. It was Dave.

"Hey Ellie, Theodore."

"Dave?" Why was he back? "what are you doing home?"

"I called him here." We looked over. A man in a white coat was sitting in the dark foyer. He stood up and I could see his face. It was ragged with years of experience, "Theodore, is it?"

"Yes, who are you?"

"I'm Dr. Martin. I've heard about your neurological problems. I'm here to help you."

I looked at Eleanor, she was looking at the floor, "No, there's nothing wrong. I'm fine! I'm completely sane!"

He stepped near Dave and stood next to him, "There's no reason to be startled. I'm going to help you."

"You, no-" What the hell! Eleanor, why have you betrayed my trust like this, why so quickly? I knew it wouldn't work, you would eventually betray me, but it's only been a few hours. I can't go to a mental hospital, what will the world think? We'll be ruined. I won't be able to do anything later in life without being known as the crazy one.

"What are you afraid of Theo?" Dave said. He was acting strangely, "We just want to help you."

"There's nothing to help," I turned to run, and Eleanor grabbed hold of me, "Ellie-"

"Teddy, I love you, and that's why I have to do this," she pulled out a large needle and stabbed me with it.

"Damn," I breathed. I grabbed her arm and slapped it away. She let go of me. For a second we just stood there and stared at each other.

"Are you going to let me push the plunger down?" She had a weird look on her face. What were her intentions? Does she really want to help me?

"No, I'm not," I pulled the needle out and ran out the door.

"Theodore, you won't escape," Dr. Martin said as he started to chase after me. He was floating off the ground; at least, I think he was. I couldn't see his feet; they were obscured by his jacket. I looked forward. The sky was dark again and it started to lightly rain. I turned corners, I ran until I thought I couldn't run anymore. I came to a courtyard. Why were there no cars around it? Where was I?

I couldn't see Dr. Martin anymore, and the rain had stopped. This weather is starting to confound me. In front of my was a beautiful garden in full bloom, and, in the center, was a fountain. I ran up to it and started to drink from it. The water was so fantastic. I jumped in. I was savage. I was an animal.

"Theodore, you need help," Dr. Martin had found me. What am I to do? "Look at yourself, you're insane. You look like an animal!"

I looked down at my reflection in the fountain's waters. I had changed into something I didn't recognize. I was shaggy and unkempt. My fur was completely matted and disgusting. What was I?

"We just want to help you," Alvin said as he appeared from the shadows.

"We love you," Simon said.

"You need to get better," Jeanette had appeared.

"And we can help you," Brittney came in behind Jeanette.

"Please Theodore," Dave said as he came in.

"Teddy-"Eleanor was the last to come. They were surrounding me on all sides. They started to get closer, step by step. I fell backwards into the fountain. They all had needles. Large, terrifying needles. What was in them?

"We are going to help you," When Dr. Martin finished his sentence, they all stabbed me. I screamed, and found myself in my bed, screaming. I was in a cold sweat. It was 5 am. It was so early. Tuesday Morning started like the last, a waking nightmare.

* * *

It wouldn't have made any sense to go back to bed at that point, so I just started my day. It was still dark outside, well, twilight. The sun was just barely rising. I walked downstairs and went to the kitchen. I wasn't really fully awake at that point, but somewhere in the middle of awake and sleep. My feet felt the cool tile in the kitchen. I flipped on a light. The white light was so intense; my eyes weren't used to light yet. I walked over to the cupboard and grabbed some cereal. I turned, and something went across my vision. Something out of the corner of my eye, like a shadow.

"Hello?" I said softly. I couldn't hear anything. Nothing was moving in the house, so why do I feel like I'm being watched. I could feel something, something was looking at me. Its eyes were warm on my chest, but I couldn't sense what direction it was coming from. I put down the cereal and walked out of the kitchen. I turned the corner and faced the stairs. I crept closely to the stairs and put my face inches away from them, "Is anyone here?" I asked. There was no response. I sat for a second until a faint knocking startled me.

Who could possibly be here this early? I slowly walked towards the door and looked through the peephole. I opened the door, "Good morning Ellie. What are you doing here?" Eleanor has here. I checked my watch, "You are aware that it's five thirty in the morning, right?"

She laughed and walked inside, "I know it's a bit unreasonable for me to be here, but, after you told me everything that was going on I thought that I should be here early in the morning," My sanity is lucky to have her helping me now, she leaned in and hugged me. She looked up, still hugging me, "so, what's for breakfast?"

* * *

Ellie and I sat and talked in the kitchen, eating breakfast. Nothing too extravagant, just cereal. We didn't want Simon or Alvin to wake up and bother us; we needed to talk about my condition, "I just feel like I'm starting to get paranoid. I'm losing my grip on reality," I said between chewing.

"At the very least you still understand that something is wrong and you haven't given into your hallucinations yet. How have they been recently?" she asked.

"My hallucinations? Well, I had some before you came today."

"What were they?"

"Nothing, just fleeting shadows in the corners of my eyes."

"It's interesting that you say that," she stood up and started looking at things around the kitchen. I wasn't sure what in the world she was doing, but she was examining all the electronics intently, "I was having the same thing happening to me when I sat down here."

"Are you serious?" Maybe I wasn't crazy and this was coming from outside my body. Actually, I'm not sure which would be better, being crazy or being… attacked by something outside my control.

"Yeah. A physicist recently found out that if something, anything, that vibrates at the right frequency can make your corneas resonate. Now, it's not going to damage your corneas, but it will make you think you see things in the corners of your eyes," she put her ear to the ground, trying to find the source of the vibrations.

I stood up and grabbed our dishes, "that's amazing!" I exclaimed, "I'm glad I brought you on board, you seem to know a lot about my problems. Maybe we can solve all of them."

She gave a weary smile, "Thank you Theodore. Now, let's go see if we can find the source of the vibration," Although she didn't sound terribly confidant, it was better than anything I could muster up. I she was putting on the strongest face she could, and yet, it was still doubtful? Am I condemned to being messed up? I put the dishes in the sink and started around the house. We got to the living room and stopped. She was in front of me, and, without turning around, she said, "Say anything if the visions get more prevalent. I'm sorry I can't see them."

I understood the science behind it, I'm confused as to why she wouldn't be able to, "Why won't you be able to."

She laughed and turned around. She put her hand up to her eye and started blinking, "I just found out last month before you guys got back," she pulled out a contact, "I have an astigmatism. My corneas are slightly warped, making it so that I can't see as easily, and changing the resonance frequency of the aforementioned corneas."

I was shocked, "When did you get so smart?"

She laughed and put the contact back in her eye, "I'll take that as a compliment, not an insult."

"It's because I'm just so darn cute isn't it," I gave her a fiendish smile.

She got closer to me and pulled me towards her, "That must be it," I started to lean in to kisser her. As I slowly closed my eyes I pulled back, "What is it?" She asked, concerned.

"I just saw one," fleeting, in the corner of my eye fled a shadow. Dancing. Playing with me. I couldn't let it get the better of me. I closed my eyes again and listened. Something that was doing this must have been making a noise.

"What are you doing?" I guess closing my eyes was a bit odd at that part. Possibly because I had such an intense look on my face.

"I'm listening. Vibration means sound."

"The frequency is under your hearing registry," I opened my eyes.

"I guess you should lead then."

She laughed, "I'll head this mission then," We walked towards the basement, me closely following behind her, "Most of these cases have noted that things like heating units are usually the perpetrators. Let's head to the basement then.

We walked slowly down the stairs. My headaches settled back in. It was intensifying as we got lower. Something caught my eye, "to our right," she nodded and turned right. It happened again, "They're becoming more frequent."

"Then we're getting closer," she said with conviction. We got to the back of the basement to a door. She opened it. It was a small closet with the house's heater in it. She grabbed a hold of one of the pipes, "do you see anything?"

"Well yeah, I can see the heater, you, everything!"

She rolled her eyes, "I mean the shades!"

I laughed, "Not at the moment."

"What about before I grabbed the pipe?"

"I did but not right before," she let go of the pipe and they were flanking me on both sides, "Oh yeah, they're back."

She took grasped it again and they disappeared, "Then here's the problem."

* * *

We spent the twenty minutes tightening the pipes until they disappeared. With every turn of the wrench, we would stop and check. After a while, they finally disappeared. She was an exorcist, casting out my demons, literally in this situation.

"Theo?" Alvin was calling me from upstairs. I took my phone out of my pocket and check the time. It was 7:30 and we needed to leave for school, "Where are you?"

"Can you go distract him for a second? I'm going to clean up," I said to Ellie. She shook her head and went upstairs.

She ran upstairs and literally ran into Alvin. He looked shocked when she appeared from the basement, "Ellie," Alvin said, regaining his composure, "What… What are you doing here? Where's Theo?"

"I'm just," she remembered the secretive nature of her business with Theodore, "I spent the night last night."

"What?" Alvin was completely floored, "How did… What is… Fuck, I don't even care as long as you're using protection," He walked away muttering things to himself. He went in to the kitchen and grabbed his backpack, "Haven't you two been together for less than twelve hours?"

Eleanor looked away, "Well, you know, you're brother and I have always been really close, and… stuff. Our love was—" she paused to think of the right words, "Already present when we officially started seeing each other. I guess it, uh, got the better of us."

Alvin walked back towards her, "Well, whatever. It's not my place to judge," he sighed, "Are you two driving separately today?"

"Yeah, He wanted to drive alone today," she wasn't sure how he felt about the driving situation but that wasn't really the biggest of his problems. Now Alvin thinks they've been having sex. It's not as bad as it could have been though. Everyone at school was so apathetic that nobody cared who was with whom. It wouldn't spread outside of their siblings.

"Cool, I'll see you in Econ then," Alvin walked out the door and Eleanor let out a large breath

"Theodore!"

I had just finished putting everything away and yelled back, "What? I'm coming!" No reply. Alvin must have walked away. I ran to the stairs.

"Theo!"

I ran up the stairs to Eleanor, "Calm down, I said I was coming!"

"I must not have heard you," she responded, "Ready to go?"

"Yeah," I looked around. It was just me and her, "Where's Alvin?"

"He just left, why?"

"Oh, well," he wasn't there? How did I hear him yell? "Nothing," I laughed nervously, "Let's just go."

When we got into the car, she explained the lie she had told to Alvin. It, at the very least, was pretty air tight until the Chipettes were told about it. I don't know what we're going to do then. The headache. It was in full swing, "So, what are we going to do when your sisters question the validity of the lie?"

She looked up at the roof of the car, lost in thought, "Well, I can just say I snuck out after they went to bed. They didn't see me leave this morning, I was awake too early. If they say otherwise, it's easy to counter with they must have been mistaken. Why would we try to validate having sex? They won't question us too much after all that."

"You're right. After we give the story, they won't try to poke holes in it. They aren't there to know about our love life."

"Exactly, we're going to be fine," she smiled, "I'm sorry I had to use such a vulgar topic to cover our asses."

"Don't worry, whatever works. I don't want to this to get public."

"Why not?" she asked, "I understand that it can't get public because it would tarnish our image, but why not tell everyone."

I sighed, "The way I see it now is that they can't help me, so why get them worried. I rather have them thinking I'm too perfect than screwed up."

"Then why not, at the very least, she a psychologist?" She said, "Doctor-patient confidentiality protects you from it being revealed by anyone that works there. Anyone, that includes receptionists."

We stopped at a stop light, "I considered that, but then I thought about something else. Look around you to everyone that's walking around," I motioned outside, "Look at them. Do you see anything peculiar?"

She looked around intently, "No, they're just random people."

"One," I pointed outside, "Two," I pointed again, "Three, four, five, six. There are six paparazzo on this street corner right now. Although I have doctor-patient confidentiality, that's not what I'm worried about. At any given time, one of these vultures could see me walking out of the place and take a picture. Worse, he can misconstrue it into anything he wants. Remember that time Dave fought the paparazzo every month when he was dating again," I started to drive again after the light changed, "I can't risk it. After the tour, after we're done, I can get everything taken care of. Just a little more time."

"You're risking a lot for us," she said, "I don't want you to get hurt."

"I won't, don't worry."

We got to school a tad bit late. It was fine; I really didn't want to be there today. My first class today was a philosophy class. I hadn't done the reading the day before; it's going to be a tough day. I got into class and sat in the back. My teacher wasn't happy, but I shrugged it off. We started to read and I could hear something. It was, it was a ticking.

I looked up and I could hear the clock ticking from ten feet away. It was loud; every tick was like a gunshot straight to my head. My headache was intensifying. I looked through my bag and I found it. The vicoden. I didn't want to take it. I had to. I grabbed it and quickly threw it back into the bag. I took the pill, dry swallowed. It roughly made its way down my throat. I while later I could feel the euphoria take over my body. The ticking stopped. I exhaled deeply.

"Theodore Seville?" My teacher yelled.

"Yes?" I responded.

"Can you explicated line 15-27?"

"I can't," I smiled, "It's all throwing me for a loop."

* * *

"So let me get this straight," We were all sitting at a lunch table we had to ourselves on occasion. Brittney looked somewhat angry as she was interrogating us. Jeanette was despondent, out in her own world. Simon was focused, but simply gathering information. Alvin was aloof, "You snuck out last night to have sex with your boyfriend, with whom you haven't even celebrated one day with."

"Yes, that's right," Eleanor said. It was like she was on trial and I saw the defense attorney.

Brittney glared at us, then smiled, "You're such a ho!"

I sighed and Eleanor quickly fired back, "Whatever, at least I _knew_ Theodore for longer than twenty-four hours before giving it up," Eleanor smiled, "What's your pre-requisite, Brittney? A pulse?"

Alvin started to shout laughter, "Damn, she got you!"

"He has to be hot too!" She looked over to Alvin, "And you, Alvin. You're worse than me!" They started to playfully argue.

"So, where do you go now?" Simon asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, you've gone as far as far gets without fetish."

"I hardly think that's any of your business!' I said, exasperatedly.

"I guess it isn't. Just be careful," Simon got up to leave, "You coming Jeanette?"

"Hmm? Yeah I guess," Jeanette got up too.

"Where are you two going?" Eleanor asked. The bell started ringing and it shocked my head. The pain was piercing.

"Well the bell dictates that we go to our next class, which we have together," he started walking away and waved, "I suggest you go you two."

"Yeah," I said. Alvin and Brittney had already left. I looked over to Eleanor, "You want to go?"

"Let's bounce!" she said, laughing. I was taking in her face. She's so beautiful, and her smile, is just one of those great thing. I got a little lost in her eye, "Theo?" she asked.

I snapped out of my trance, "Oh yeah, sorry," something fleeting caught my eye. A shadow was behind her. It turned the corner and kept moving. I got up and started following it, "Ellie, I saw something. It was running behind you," she got up and started following me. I started running down the vacated hallways. I would catch a glimpse of it as it would turn corners, but nothing more. The headaches were starting to get worse.

"Where is it going?" She asked as we were both running.

"I don't know yet. I'm going to find out." Twists and turns until it lead me to the gym and then the pool. We were on the deck and I looked at the other side of the pool. I looked around. I couldn't see it; it had disappeared, "It's gone."

"Damn."

"Ellie, I don't know if I can handle being at school for the rest of the day. I'm going to head home, if you want to come with me."

"Yeah, I don't have anything serious to do today."

"I'm just too tired. The headaches are really starting to get to me."

She hugged me from behind and I dipped my head down, "Then let's get home and take a nap.

* * *

We left without much difficulty. I had a press pass for the school newspaper which let me leave whenever I wanted to really and I just said she was with me. In reality, our status would have probably let us leave, but this was so much easier. We drove home talking about random things, but the sounds were killing my head. She told me about her day, the test she took, the creep that was messing with her, everything. I love every second of it. I can tell she was trying to promote an air of normality in my life, and I loved her for it. Sadly, every healing word she was saying was hurting me at the same time. I couldn't tell her that of course. I wanted her to keep talking. I wanted us to be a normal couple who was leaving school to spend time together, not a man who's on the verge of a psychotic break and his girlfriend he doesn't deserve.

She was talking about the teacher she hated when I interrupted her, "Ellie, what if I'm crazy?"

Her face went sullen, "Do you think you're becoming crazy?"

"I do. I'm scared. I don't want to lose my grip on reality. All we really have in the world, the only real constant in our lives is the idea that we exist and this is real. I feel like the scariest part of being crazy, especially schizophrenia, is losing that link to the world we knew. I feel like my link is disappearing and now two different realities are colliding."

"Teddy," she rubbed my arm, "I think because you're able to sit through and rationalize all parts of your condition, you can't be crazy. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. You are doing new things, trying to fight this, trying to lead to a new future. One we get done with the concert, we'll get you help and move onto our normal lives."

To be normal. I wish. I wish I could just be a normal person. I wish I didn't have to care about the last concert. It was coming up quickly. I hope I can hold out until then. I hope I can stay well.

We got home and went up to my room. I jump into my pajamas; I felt that there was no real reason to not go out. She changed into one of my shirts and some of Alvin's athletic shorts. They fit her better than mine. We climbed into bed. I hope that Simon and Alvin didn't come home and find us. I really didn't want them to think that we were not just sleeping together, but sleeping together, savy? So it goes, they'll think what they want to think. I'm just glad Dave isn't around.

"Goodnight Teddy," she looked apprehensive, "It's alright if I call you Teddy, right?"

I smiled, "it's fine," I gave her a quick peck, "I would give you more, but I really am tired."

She smiled, "I understand. Later, for sure though."

"For sure," she leaned into me and I embraced her from behind. We fell asleep spooning with the sheets only covering half of our bodies.

"Welcome to my office, Theodore," I was sitting in an office. I didn't recognize it at all. It felt so real. I could feel the velvet on the red chair I was sitting it. I rubbed the armrests. It was so soft and smooth. I looked around me. The walls were an eggshell white, and the windows overlooked a city-scape. I looked around to the voice when a light turned on. It was exposing another chair across the burgundy desk, "Winston," he clapped his hands twice and a man appeared at my side. He turned around in his chair. He was wearing a black pinstripe suit and a Black fedora. He had on glasses, but he had striking green eyes. His hair was jet black and gelled into a faux-hawk, "Would you like a drink? Maybe a Cigar?" Winston held up a tray with cigars and a few bottles on it.

I was stunned. I must be dreaming, but what's going on? "No thank you," Winston walked over to the man and handed him a cigar and poured him some cognac, "Alright, who the hell are you?"

He laughed, "I'm sure you know me well. I'm you Theodore." He put his left hand on his face. He tugged at it and it popped off like a mask. Underneath it was my own face. My face was underneath his, "See?" he put on his own face again, "Well, I'm you, but I'm a bit different. I'm you, but not you. I'm my own individual."

"Are you these things I see? Are you my headaches?" I yelled at him. I stood up but Winston appeared behind me and restrained me. He forced me back unto the chair and held me down by my shoulders. I was squirming and wriggling but I couldn't get away.

He stood up and readjusted his suit to get out all of the creases. He came over to me and leaned over me, "Theodore, you're right. I'm that little voice in your head. I'm the disembodied shouting. I'm the shadows in the corner of your eyes. I'm the creeping feeling that you're being watched. I'm your dreams. I'm your fears. I'm everything, Theodore."

"If you're me, why are you doing these things? We're one in the same, aren't we?" He smiled and Winston started pushing my chair over to the window. He snapped and the glass disappeared. I could feel the cold breeze bursting into the office.

He walked over to me and leaned in over my shoulder, "Teddy, do I need a reason?" He put his hand on the back of the chair. Winston left go of me and he pushed me off of the chair and out of the window. I started to fall. The buildings around me were flying by. I looked down. The ground was quickly approaching. I sure hope this is a dream.

I jerked back awake in my bed. Eleanor was awoken by my fast movements, "Teddy, are you alright?"

I swallowed heavily. I was breathing heavily and I said, "I just had a bad dream."

She sat up with me, "What was it about?"

My breathing slowed down, "My mental problems were manifested as a man. He's real, and he's living inside my mind. He threw me out of a window."

"That's terrifying!" She grabbed my torso and held unto me.

"The worst part is, when I asked him why he was doing all of this," I let out a small tear, "He said he didn't need a reason," The entity that was destroying my life was seemingly doing it for no reason. How am I supposed to fight that? I feel like I have no place to escape now. I can't sleep and no what's real. I can't be awake and know what is real. I have nowhere to go. I grabbed my phone from the end table and looked at it. It was 4 p.m. Tuesday afternoon. The concert is this Saturday. I have one more week to fight this. I grabbed my backpack and took a Vicoden to quell my headache. I wonder when I'll see him again. I wonder when I can end this whole thing.


	3. Part 3

"Theodore, welcome back. You're looking well."

"Save the pleasantries, and please don't mock me. I can find a million other people that can help me, Kyle."

He laughed, "now let's not get hasty. You want the same as last time?"

"Yeah, I do," I gave him the money and he gave me the vicoden in a blue tinged baggie. IT was an oddly colored bag, the last one was a clear sandwich bag. It doesn't really matter I guess. Ever since my dream encounter with that man, my headaches are becoming more prevalent. I can't pay attention to anything anymore when they're about. The static in my mind has become more aggressive. It's like there's a TV in my head that doesn't work, and he turned that one all the way up, "Thanks," it was so cold that morning in the parking lot. I didn't want to be late for class so I hurried inside. Wednesday morning, seven forty-five a.m. The only thing I couldn't share with Eleanor was my usage. I closed my jacket and ran back in. I couldn't be late again.

The bell rang and I was already at my desk. I got out my books and Eleanor came and set in the desk next to me, "Hey Theo!" she was smiling a huge smile. I envied her strength.

"Hey," I was searching through my back pack. I forgot the textbook I needed, I think. I was still looking futilely.

Her disposition went down, "Is everything alright? Are you having—"she got close and whispered, "an episode?"

"No, I'm not," I was indignant. I looked up at her and she was taken aback with my behavior, "I'm sorry, I just forgot my textbook so I'm a little pissed at myself right now," I raised my hand.

"Yes, Theo?" The teacher responded.

"I've forgotten my text. Mind if I go get it?"

She sighed, "Make it quick," I flashed a quick smile at Eleanor and ran out of the room. I had grabbed my pills with me so I could take one without having to dry swallow it. The headaches weren't terrible right now, but it was preventative. I got to a water fountain and took two pills. The effect was immediate; the euphoria was unlike anything else. I sat down for just a second next to the fountain, eyes glazed over. I regained a hold of myself and kept going. I couldn't take too long.

I got to my locker and opened it up. It was messy, but I kept all of my textbooks in the same place. I reached up to the shelf and grabbed around for it. I looked, and re-looked but it wasn't there. I dropped to my knees and started looking at the bottom of the locker. I tossed papers, food, drinks, clothes, everything around. I searched, and it wasn't there. I was baffled, I didn't bring it home, did I? I may have, that was stupid of me.

"What's troubling you, Theodore," That voice make the hair on my neck stand up on end.

"What are you doing here?" I didn't need to stand up or turn around to know it was him. I turned around and got up to face him. He had his hands behind his back, wearing the same pinstripe suit and the fedora.

"Well, wherever you are, I am, so, I'm here to learn. And to enjoy the eye candy. Eleanor is particularly beautiful today, isn't she?"

I ran towards him, "Don't you say a fucking thing about Eleanor! Don't ever mention her name!" I was yelling. I got close to him and cocked back my arm. He smiled, and something grabbed my right arm, that was mere inches from his face . I turned around, and black tendrils of light, or something, were jetting out of my locker, and they had grabbed my arm. He walked towards me. The same pace he was walking, I started getting pulled backwards. More tendrils latched unto me and dragged me back until I was against my locker.

He brought his arms from behind his back and dropped my textbook in front of me, "I thought you might need this."

"How did you get that?" I asked.

"Theodore, you keep asking these questions that have obvious answers. I got it from you, of course."

"What do you mean?" I was confused, and my arms were starting to hurt from the constriction, "I never gave you the book."

"Yeah, you never gave it to me," I dropped to the ground and he leaned over me, "but you need to understand that everything that's yours is mine. This book, your locker, your car, your friends, Eleanor," I cringed and looked away, but his smile widened, "your life, and this choice is ours," He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a handgun.

I was terrified; he was going to kill me, then and there. He snapped, and it released the tendril around my left arm. What was he going to do? He got down on one knee and handed me the gun, "Theodore, by the end of this whole mess, you're going to kill yourself. I'm giving you the option to do it now," What the fuck was he talking about? "I know you're thinking, how could he possibly know all this? Well, I do. I know that by the end of this I won't be the one that's gone, it's going to be you."

"Would you die along with me?"

"That's a risk I'm willing to take," He was insane, willing to risk his self in order to see me dead. If I was gone, there was no way he could persist, but he was deluded enough to let it happen, "I'm not deluded by the way."

"How so?" I shouted, "You possibly think you can persist without me? Face it, you need me to still be alive, and I don't need you," I turned the gun to his head and fired. It hit and he started to bleed along the side of his head, but he wasn't dying.

He pulled out a handkerchief and wiped the blood off his face. The wound was healed. He started to laugh in short, quick, but loud bursts, "You think that can kill me? You're the deluded one now," he took the gun from my hand and held it back to my head, "You're going to die, but not by my hands," he pulled the trigger and I slammed my eyes shut. I couldn't feel anything, so I slowly opened my eyes, and I was back in my bed. I looked around and grabbed my phone form the end table. 10 a.m. Wednesday morning. Shit, I hopped out of bed and ran for the door.

I got dressed and turned the corner to go downstairs. I ran to the door and smelled coffee. I wanted some; I was really tired after all. I went to the kitchen and poured myself a mug. I drank it super quickly; it was still warm which was nice. I walked to the door, "Later Theo!"

"Ellie?" I turned to my right and she was stilling in the living room reading something and drinking a glass of coffee, "Wait, why aren't you at school?"

She laughed, "I called us in sick today. You were still asleep, and, for the life of me, I couldn't wake you up," The headaches settled in, "You were still breathing, so I just let you sleep. Go grab some coffee and we'll have a chill day here."

I smiled, "that sounds good," I did want another cup, but I needed to take my pills. I would only have 3 more left from yesterday; I guess buying form Kyle would have been a dream. I put my backpack on the counter and poured myself another glass. I grabbed my pack and ruffled through it for the pills. I grabbed them. A blue baggie, full of pills, "This is a dream."

I woke up outside my locker with my book in my hands. I looked at my phone to check the time. It only took me five minutes to experience all of that. If that was a dream, that means. That means he's real.

* * *

I walked back into class and sat down next to Eleanor. She turned her head and smiled at me; her smile quickly changed when she noticed I wasn't smiling back. She saw I was distressed and she whispered to me, "What's wrong?"

"I think I blacked out at my locker, but it wasn't for long. I don't know. I'm not sure how much of it I was experiencing and how much of it I dreamt," I whispered.

"What do you mean?" She looked really worried.

"I'm not sure what parts of it was a dream and what parts weren't. Well, I do know one part of it was a dream, but the part before it, I don't know what all I did."

"Explain it all to me," I started to tell her everything. The man, the gun, the second dream and the awakening. Her face went from interested, to shocked, and to worried. I was so tired of seeing her worry about me. The face she made killed me. Every crease in her face, her scrunched up forehead and nose, it was slight but I could tell, "So the man intends… intends to kill you?"

"I don't know, I think he just wants me dead."

"What can he possibly gain from you being dead, he said it himself that you're the same."

"I'm not sure if logic need apply here. It's like were playing a game but we don't know any of the rules," I said as her eyes dropped, "We don't know what exactly he is, or how everything works. I don't understand how he would gain from me being dead. I feel like he would die without me. "

"Well, that's the next step. We need to figure this entire thing out. One last thing, how did you not know what was real?"

"How we interacted, me and the man, I didn't know if I was actually doing these things, or if he was just in my head at the time. I didn't know if I was dreaming when I was with him. I hope I was dreaming. I don't want him to be with me when I'm conscious."

"I understand," She turned back around, "I guess we should pay attention."

"Yeah, we should," we faced forward again. She was visibly distraught by all of this. I think it was starting to get too much. The man was getting to her.

"Teddy?" She said after a couple of minutes.

"Yeah?" I said.

"I love you," she gave me a weak smile.

"I love you too," I smiled back. I reached out my hand and she grabbed a hold of it.

* * *

I didn't need to take anymore pills for the rest of the day. I started to form a theory; maybe he didn't have the ability to manifest himself all the time. Maybe he needed to rest, recharge himself. I'm not sure. I can only hope that's true. The headaches weren't prevalent immediately after the episodes I had with him. It was 6 p.m. Thursday night, and we were eating dinner with Jeanette and Simon.

It was fairly silent in the restaurant. We went to an Indian place in Silver lake, and it was relatively vacant. Even for a weekday, people weren't there. The lighting was soft, and it smelled like fresh naan. Not having a headache for the first time in weeks was great. I was able to take in the ambiance of the moment. After we ordered, we continued our conversation at a different point.

"Why did you guys dip out Tuesday?" Jeanette asked.

"What do you mean?" Eleanor was a terrible liar, but she tried to cover things up.

"Oh don't okay games, Ellie," Simon said as he took off his glasses for a second, "we know you guys left midway into the day, a little after we all met for lunch," he blew on them and wiped them on his shirt, cleaning a small stain, "Why was that?"

"I know what you're thinking," I said, "You're thinking that our overactive libidos are getting the better of us. We don't just have sex all the time, you know," I smiled, "I was feeling sick so she came back with me to make sure I was fine," I grabbed her hand under the table and stroked it with my thumb. She looked at me and smiled, "She pampers me."

Jeanette looked worried, "Are you going to be alright for the show?"

"Oh yeah," I said, "I'm fine now."

"Oh yeah, you're totally fine. You're not hearing voices or anything," it was him. His voice was echoing in my mind. It was blotting out all the other voices, only catching bits of what everyone was saying around me.

_You at least owe me your name at this point._

"You, mocking me? That's funny."

_I'm not mocking you, I just want to know the name of my tormentor._

"You should have at least figured out at this point that I'm you. Are you that thick headed?"

_So that's funny. I've been reading up about how crazy I am, and I've realized that, although you seem like schizophrenia you can't be._

"Why not?"

_I'm having a conversation with you. Schizophrenic hallucinations are irrational shoutings. You and I are talking, so you can't be it. I think I know what you are. You're just a slight delusion. Nothing a few pills can't take care of. _

"Well, I can take care of that," A bunch of different voices started talking, "You were talking about it earlier, you don't know the rules and you don't know what all I can do. Enjoy the people talking."

"Theodore?" Jeanette, Simon and Eleanor were all looking at me, confused.

The voices were so loud, "Yeah?" I had a stressed look on my face.

"Are you… are you going to need help moving your drums to practice tomorrow?" Jeanette asked me.

"Uh," I barely heard what she said. They were chattering on about the most random things. I don't even know what to do now, "No, no I'll be able to fit it all. If you'll all excuse me, I have to go to the bathroom," I stood up and ran to the bathroom.

"Um, I'm going to go check on him. He was having… he was having intestinal problems earlier," she got up and followed me.

I ran in and collapsed on the floor. The voices were so loud, "Let me go, dammit! Stop the fucking talking, I'll do anything! Anything!" I yelled. I gripped my head and I crashed onto the floor.

"Theodore!" Eleanor ran in and got on the ground with me.

"He made voices, they're all just chattering about nonsense, and I can't do anything about it," I started lying on the floor.

"You need to get up and make Simon and Jeanette think that you're fine," I looked up at her and the voices were replaces by a slight ringing that slowly faded away. I sat up.

"They're gone. Alright, Alright," I stood up and pulled her up with me. She jumped into my arms and held onto me. I pulled her back, "Let's go put on a show."

She smiled, "Only a few more days, and we can get you help," we started walking, "also, you have diarrhea."

"I won't ask questions," we came and sat back down, "I have diarrhea," I said, Simon and Jeanette looked shocked. I smiled, "Oh look! Our food's here," they kept looking shocked as I started to eat.

* * *

Practice for the show was fast approaching. Every tick of the clock got me closer to my eventual freedom. He was throwing the voices at me more often, but I was starting to be able to drown them out. He wouldn't get to me. I was going to win this fight, one way or another.

After school ended, Eleanor and I rode to the venue with my drums. It was across town, about a twenty minute drive. We chatted about anything. I needed constant talking to help focus my skills in drowning them out. They were like the tides, surging in and out, lower and higher in a uniform fashion. I would just concentrate harder when I needed to.

"How are they doing?" She asked.

"They've gotten quieter. I'm learning how to drown them out, that's why I've been talking so much. I need a constant gauge to know how I'm doing. So even if we're not talking, just start singing. "

She laughed, "Extra practice I guess," she said, "we're getting so close, and you're doing so well. We can do this."

"I know we can," I just have to stay focused.

We got inside the building and the stage directors told us where to set up. I was glad that this would be the last time. The stress of touring was starting to wear on me, and being a teen idol simply doesn't suit me well. I was ready to assume a completely normal life. I set up my drums at the appropriate places, signified by Xs. I looked behind me. They had set up a huge poster with all of our faces. I stared at it for a while; the voices were quiet. It's like they were anticipating something. I kept looking at the posters. IS this what they wanted? An image that makes out lives? Now was not the time, we needed to start practicing.

Everyone else arrived a little after me. I needed to be the first one on stage; it took me the longest to set up. Alvin and Brittney were in front, Alvin with his Stratocaster and Brittney flanked him closely. Jeanette was on the right of Alvin, playing a keyboard, with Eleanor next to her that had a computer and synthesizer set up. Simon was on the left of Brittney with his bass, and I was in back. I suited me the best. They came in and started chatting about the set list, but I wasn't really listening. I had it memorized, same thing for the last year.

"Everyone ready?" the stage manager asked. We nodded in affirmation. The first song started, Look at Me (When I Rock Wichoo) by Black Kids. It was hard to pick songs that used all of us in vocals, but we found a few bands were really good for it. His drum parts were difficult to follow, but it went well. I'd been doing the song forever now. It was odd, everything was going well. The next song was Pull Shapes, by the Pipettes. The girls were the only ones singing in this one.

The voices started again, but it didn't get to me, "I'm glad that it doesn't."

_What do you want? _The lights were flashing and the noise was crazy. I was focusing hard on my beat, but it was getting difficult to talk to him.

"I just wanted you to know that tonight is the big finale! It wall ends—" he paused for a second, "Now!" I got a splitting headache and stopped playing at the second verse. Everyone looked at me as I gripped my head. I threw my hands down to my side, but I couldn't help but squint in pain.

"Is everything alright, Theo?" The stage manager said.

"He's been feeling sick," Eleanor said. Simon and Jeanette nodded after she said that.

"I'll be right back, let me go take five and I'll be alright," I got up and ran to my dressing room.

"What's the matter, Teddy?" I slammed the door and locked it. He appeared from behind a clothing rack, "Can't handle it this time?" I grabbed my vicodin and took a few pills, "I'm afraid, this time, you aren't going to get out of this," The black tendrils grabbed me and forced me to sit down in my chair.

Back on the stage, Eleanor said, "I think I'll go make sure he's fine," She dropped her headphones and walked back off stage.

"I have someone you need to meet," He motioned to the right side of the room. The black tendrils kept me still as I struggled to get free, "You may already know her though," Eleanor walked out into my vision.

"I know that's not her, you can't trick me," I said as I kept thrashing in my chair.

"I know that, I just wanted to do this the right way," he motioned for Eleanor to come to his side, "Ellie baby, take this," he pulled out the gun again and handed it to her, "I wanted her to kill you."

She started walking towards me. I got a good look at her. She looked just like Eleanor, but with emptiness in her eyes. She lifted up the gun to my head. Someone knocked at the door, "Teddy, open the door!" Eleanor shouted.

"What a nice surprise! She can witness your death!" He said, laughing crazily, "It will all be full circle!"

"I can't right now!" I shouted to Eleanor, "Trust me, please just trust me and leave."

"Al-alright," she said hesitantly, "I'll go stall," I heard her walk off.

"That's too bad," he said, looking sad, "Well, anyway, go ahead and kill him now, I don't have much time."

Eleanor lifted the gun to my head and pulled back the hammer, "No," I whispered.

"What was that?" He asked.

"No!" I shouted. I got my arm free from the tendrils and grabbed the gun that was to my head, "You said it yourself, you are me aren't you?" He looked shocked. I tore the rest of the tendrils off and Eleanor disappeared, "You had me convinced that I couldn't do anything to stop you, that you were calling all the shots. The voices gave me a way to control you. I've trained myself to stop you," I walked over to him. He stood across the room, dumbfounded, "When you're in my brain, you will play by my rules," He collapsed to the ground.

"What are you doing?" He yelled. His body twisted and contorted under my will until he was on his knees. I held the gun up to his head.

"I'm in control again," I smiled, "And, I want you to leave," I pulled back the hammer.

He smiled and started laughing, "You can't even being to know what's all at play here. You think you've won just because I can't control my body anymore? This isn't the end, Theodore Seville. Not even close."

I got on one knee and whispered into his ear, "You're just a dog, barking in the dark," I pulled the trigger, which didn't make a sound. His body hit the ground and slowly dissolved. I got back up. The gun had disappeared. The voices were gone, and so was my headache. I walked back outside and sat back down at my drum kit.

"Are you alright, Theo?" The stage manager asked, "are you going to be able to play?"

Eleanor ran up to my side, "Is everything alright?" she asked.

I whispered to her, "Yeah, I just won," she smiled. I turned to the stage manager, "I'm going to be fine. Sorry everyone," I smiled, "Let's get ready for this show."


	4. Part 4

**A/N: I was telling Simkaye this, but I will be finishing all my stories by August 14, when I return to school. If you're keeping track at home, that's Leave a Light on and Our Ill Will, now that this is done, both of which have two more parts. It's going to be difficult, but I don't want to leave people in suspense while i'm at school. It's going to be slow this next semester. If you want me to do one faster, or have any sort of requests, I can help you out there. Send me a message and we'll chat.

* * *

**

"Are you all really retiring after all of this? You're not even eighteen yet. Your careers have only places to go!" The show went off without a hitch. He was finally gone. I wasn't plagued with headaches, but I knew I would still need help with all of this. I hadn't told anyone yet, and nobody asked questions. After the show, we were doing a farewell interview of sorts. We sat at a podium they usually used for sports interviews. It was uncomfortably warm in the room, but it was only going to be an hour or so. I was so sore from playing. I went all out, fills I would have never tried before. I was happy, really happy that it was all over.

"We are," Alvin said solemnly, "We're ready to move on. Everyone has given us such a fantastic and fun childhood and we wish that we could repay you in some way. I'm sorry we're bailing, but these times of our lives are over," It was odd how eloquent Alvin was at interviews. I still hadn't said anything. They kept asking for a while about reunions or things like that. We shot them all down. We were done, and the world needed to know it. After about forty minutes, Dave stepped in and took us away. People were still shouting questions as we left.

"Theodore! Theodore!" I turned around and stopped walking. Eleanor turned with me and fell back to stay with me. Dave and the others hadn't noticed yet, "There are rumors about some sort of mysterious illness you had during the weeks leading up to the show." I turned to Eleanor, who was about to speak but I held her back.

"Yeah, I had the stomach flu for a while, at least, that's what I thought it was," I turned to Eleanor and smiled, "But I'm fine now."

* * *

The next day I told everyone in our families what Eleanor and I had been dealing with. The headaches and self medication, the voices, the hallucinations, the blacking out, everything. Dave was immediate with his response. For Monday, I have my first appoint with Doctor Raines. She's highly regarded in her field; Dave spared no expense. Everyone was probing me with questions, especially why I didn't tell them about it. As I explained to Eleanor, there was no reason for me to get them involved in something they couldn't help. They all insisted they could, and asked why Eleanor could and they couldn't. I guess they didn't understand the severity of my struggle. I guess I hadn't been entirely honest with them. Eleanor was able to help, all of them could. I just knew I needed to be perfect. It's self imposed. I need to be perfect for the people. I need to be perfect for myself. I need to be perfect for my family. I couldn't let them know how much this hurt me. I never really told them everything like I said. It was watered down, less severe. They couldn't understand my struggle. I wouldn't let them.

We had plans, intricate and sneaky plans to make sure my treatment was never found out. Doctor Raines was located in San Diego, where I would drive every day, usually with Eleanor at my side. She was so faithful, never letting me let go. I couldn't have done it without her. In San Diego, nobody was looking for me. I was invisible. Finally, the thing we all wanted the most was finally in my hands. We relocated there after the end of the school year so I wouldn't have to drive. Nobody protested the move. When Dave was asked why, he told them that the atmosphere of Hollywood was nice when we were a part of it, but now, we wanted a change. San Diego is beautiful after all.

The treatment went well. She said I was delusional; it's not an insult in this case. It was treatable, and could be contained easily. I was glad, although I had beaten it, I knew something still existed that needed to be snuffed out. Soon, the daily sessions turned to three a week, then two, then one. By the end of my Senior year, I went Bi-weekly. She was so proud, Doctor Raines. She said I was her most successful patient. I was glad I couldn't cause her trouble.

Alvin and Brittney got together. It was nice, after all that tension, they realized they didn't need to fight each other all the time. I think it was leaving the business that did it. They really mellowed out when they weren't in the spotlight. Alvin was in a commercial for some sort of designer jeans. It was so ridiculous; he got so much grief for that. Our lives were normal. The interviews stopped after a few months and the people stopped sending us mail. I was so relieved that nobody was able to figure it all out.

Simon and Jeanette won't tell us the nature of their relationship. So secretive, but that's really the pot calling the kettle black, I guess. They were always together, studying, at least, that's what they told us. I'm not insinuating anything sexual, but I know that they loved each other. Our freshman year, they both went off to U.C. Berkeley. It was a good fit, both going for some sort of technical degree. Biochemical Engineering I believe. They were happy. I don't get to see them much now, but they were happy.

Alvin went to San Francisco State and Brittney went to UCLA for Musical Business and Fashion Design respectively. Brittney made a tween clothing line a year ago. It's working out well, to say the least. Alvin's a producer, flying around the country and scouting out bands. He says he loves it, Brittney doesn't love that he's not around. They got married shortly after we did.

It's been ten years since out last concert, almost to the day. I'm a psychiatrist now, believe it or not. I have a lot of real world experience in the matter. Eleanor got her degree in Literature, but she stay home now. I told her she didn't have to, but she insisted. She wanted our children to be raised by us and not a Nanny. It was a warm night in April. April 17, 2020, the sun was just setting over the horizon as a chilled breeze rolled over the hot earth. It was going to rain. I had just arrived home, back to our house in the suburbs of Vancouver, British Columbia. We live in a separate city technically; it's called Richmond. I work in Vancouver at a hospital, helping trauma patients get better mentally. The hours are long, but the pay was worth it. More importantly, I got to help people like me.

I walked inside. The house was colorfully decorated with things we gathered from around the country, and knick-knacks Alvin brought us from around the world. It smelled like something delicious was cooking; I walked into the kitchen and gave Eleanor a big hug form behind.

"Teddy!" she turned around and we kissed, "I didn't hear you come in."

"Ewww! You two kissed," I looked over and our children were sitting at the Kitchen table, coloring. Four years old, they were now. So quickly does time fly. Emily was the oldest technically. She had long auburn hair and was wearing a little green dress. She had big blue eyes, just like mine. Alvin said she looked like Eleanor but with my facial attributes. I hope that was a compliment. Alphonse was the middle child. He has dirty blond hair and blue eyes as well. He was just in his underwear and a mud covered blue shirt right then; I wonder how that happened. The youngest was Nicole. She looked just like her mother, with platinum blond hair and dark brown eyes. I couldn't believe how much she reminded me of Eleanor.

"It's what adults do, guys," I said, "Now where are my hugs?" They all smiled and ran over to me. They latched around my legs and I put my arms around them as I bent down. We should have planned for triplets. I guess we assumed that our families were different. I may be a Doctor, but I'm not a veterinarian, "Alphonse, where are your pants?" He giggled and ran away. I looked on as he came back wearing a pair of shorts, "That's better," Nicole and Emily held onto me as I started to walk back towards Eleanor. They were light, like most kids, but they were all built like the two of us, Eleanor and myself. It didn't bother me; I would have loved them any way they came out.

"Hungry?" Eleanor asked, not turning form the stove.

"Only every day of my life," I said with a laugh.

She laughed, "Well, it will be ready in a matter of moments," she put her hand on my arm, "Did you remember?"

"Of course," I said, taking a bottle of pills from my pocket quickly and putting them back, "I always do," she smiled, "What did the doctor say about the kids?"

"The scans were clean, but it's too early to rule anything out. In most cases, irregular brain development starts early, but in some it doesn't," she said softly.

"I feel bad that I didn't know the aspects of my own case. I have the disease, after all!"

Emily looked up to me, "What do you have, Daddy?" her eyes were worried. After all of these years, worried facial expressions have always made me cringe. It reminded me too much of what had happened.

"Nothing, baby." I said, rubbing the top of her head, "Daddy has to go change now, alright?" They both nodded, but didn't do anything, "That means I need my legs again," I said with a laugh. They smiled and jumped off. Alphonse had already returned to coloring, and they joined him. I started to walk upstairs.

"Dinner will be done when you get back," Eleanor yelled.

"Alright I yelled back. I got up to our room. Eleanor kept it in such great condition after I would leave for the day. I looked out the window. It has started to rain. It tapped lightly on the window, making a faint, yet distinct sound. I started to take off my clothes and put them away in the hampers and drawers. I threw on a green sweatshirt and sweatpants. I loved to scrub it up when I was home. I was ready to head back downstairs. Eleanor said something from downstairs, but I could hear it well.

"What was that, Ellie?" I yelled as I walked out the door. I couldn't hear anything. I was feeling a little shaky so I sat down on the floor. My whole body shuttered and shook. I reached in my pockets, grabbing for my pills. I couldn't find them. I looked up, and they were on the dresser above me. I got up, but could barely stand. I grabbed them, but my grip loosened and they dropped to the ground. I bent over, but fell. My vision was fading to black. I lost control of my arms and legs. I was falling, slowly as the darkness was enveloping my eyes.

I hit the ground with a thud and I could see again. My vision was foggy as I sat up again. It was slowly returning. My ears were ringing, but they slowly regained their ability to hear. I shook my head and looked around. Where was I?

I was on a couch. I recognized where I was, but I wasn't sure. I wasn't in my house. I closed my eyes and shouted, "Eleanor!" There was no answer, "Ellie? Al? Emily? Nicole?" Nobody answered me. I walked around the weird room and noticed some stairs leading upwards. I walked up them and opened the door at the top. Eleanor was standing on the other side, "Oh thank God," I said as I hugged her. She was, smaller. She didn't lose all the baby weight form the triplets. By no means was she fat, but now, she was smaller.

"What's the matter, Theo?" I pulled away and looked at her. She was younger. So much younger. What was going on? I ran into the bathroom and turned on the light. I was younger. My facial hair was gone, and the toll time had started taking on me was gone. I was heavier than I used to be.

"Ellie. Ellie. What's that date?"

"Tuesday, May 5th." She said as she joined me in the bathroom.

I was shocked. I splashed water on my face, "What year?"

"Teddy, what's wrong?" she said as she put her hand on my left shoulder.

"What year is it?" I yelled.

She recoiled, "2010, what's going on?" It was. It was, 2010? Ten years had passed. What was going on. I looked to her, "How much have I told you?" she was apprehensive but she told me about the first night we were together. The day of our anniversary, May 4th was yesterday. I was ten years in the past. The concert hadn't happened. I haven't fought him. My children, my life, my wife, they were all gone. I had spent the last ten years of my life in a dream. That was his last gambit. It wasn't real, nothing was real. Tears started to well up in my eyes.

"Theodore, what's wrong?" She asked, looking really worried. I rushed past her back downstairs. She started to follow me. I locked the door at the top of the stairs and ran to my backpack. She was rattling the doorknob, "Theodore!" she yelled, "Let me in! I can help you." Nobody could at this point. Nobody could console me. I had lost you, my children, my life. It was all an illusion.

I was rummaging through my backpack as she yelled at the top of the stairs. She started banging on it. I was throwing things everywhere. I found it. My bag of vicodin I had bought from Kyle. I stared at the bag.

"I can go back to you, Eleanor," she was banging at the door, "Maybe I can dream forever," I poured the contents of the bag into my hand. I looked at the pure white pills, my gateway back to the life I knew. Everything I had known for the last ten years was gone. I didn't know what was real anymore. I couldn't. I couldn't know anything anymore. I took all of the pills and laid down. I could feel them cooling my body. Eleanor's shouts were getting fainter. My eyelids were getting so heavy; they started to shut. I couldn't hear her anymore. My breaths were getting softer and softer. I was fading, my breath was getting short. I couldn't feel anything. I wasn't breathing. I could feel my consciousness drifting away.

One more second. I was leaving my body. One more second. I would be back soon. One more second, and I would fade. One more second, and I was gone.

I took a sharp breath.

* * *

**A/N: This here is how Perfection was supposed to end. I know, I hate me too. I would like to hear about your hate, if that's some sort of consolation. I want to hear what you think. Flames? sure why not, if you think that will help. It won't, but that's fine. **


End file.
